Monday, March 5, 2018

Question of the Week: Invitation


The Question of the Week is:

"Do you know of any gay couples who invite a third to join them in sex on a regular basis yet still have a strong committed relationship?  Do you think it is healthy or inviting trouble to invite a third person for sex?"

13 comments:

  1. Don't know of any couples who do that. Would it help or harm? It depends on the couple. A third person who would enjoy without getting emotionally involved could spice things up in a relationship that is waning.

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    1. It is one of those slippery slopes where things could get messy very easily if the rules change and emotions come into play. I know one couple who invited a third often into their bedroom and it did not work in the long run and they separated.

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  2. I know couples having orgias!!!
    Two men and six feet! a plus!!!

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    1. Well I do like the idea of extra feet to enjoy!

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  3. Yes, we do know a couple that asks others into the bedroom. They even asked us at one time. We had been friends for several years (we still are very good friends) when we talked about becoming friends with benefits. There were several conversations and no pressure was put on us at all. They had come to the conclusion that having another couple would help their marriage. They were still in love but had noticed their physical relationship was waning. It has worked for them. This was nearly 20 years ago and they are still together. More power to them. They had the courage to find a solution. Do whatever you can to make it work.

    We didn't join them; and we didn't judge. We just knew that we wouldn't be able to deal with the jealousy, the guilt, or the danger of hurting each other, or the possibility of sacrificing a close friendship.

    It took them a long time but they did find another couple. We have met them at other social functions and they are a charming couple. Easy going and settled in their own marriage.

    At long last the point is......
    Everybody needs to know what they are doing, why they are there, and be willing to shut it all down if the one you love can no longer handle it.

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    1. Well said. I think it does depend on the dynamics of the individuals involved. To me, it could really open the door for complications if one member feels less involved, romantic feelings begin to happen, etc.

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    2. Truth be told....I was afraid of the possibility of losing Bruce.
      I try to be an adult and I think I am reasonably well adjusted. I know he loves me and I trust him. I just couldn't deal with it if someone else fell in love with him. We seriously did consider joining our friends in the bedroom. When it comes down to it, as far as my man is concerned, he's mine.
      -Bryn

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    3. You can be selfish in that case! :-) I understand!

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  4. I was asked once to join a straight couple, and I turned them down. Still don't know why - I was an over-the-top horny 17-year old. It was the late 60s, and everyone was doing everyone, but something stopped me. Fear, I suppose, that other people we knew would find out.

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    1. Had you ever been with a guy before?

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  5. No. Unless you count jacking off with my brother an dour buddies. So, maybe that stopped me as well. My first real encounter with a man - beyond stroking cocks - happened when I was 25...with an honest-to-goodness Iowa farm boy.

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    1. Bet there was lots of plowing with that farm boy!

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  6. I know gay couples in all kinds of relationships, from complete monogamy to open relationships where they play with a third man together. I think it really depends on the personalities of the men and their ability to communicate. My BF does not like three-ways, but we are both okay with the other having a bit of fun on the side, as long as we always play safe.

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